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HornyOnMain@hexbear.net to chapotraphouse@hexbear.netEnglish · 2 years ago

To show all the ideological diversity that Hexbear has I think everyone should have to do a polcomp test. Here's mine:

hexbear.net

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To show all the ideological diversity that Hexbear has I think everyone should have to do a polcomp test. Here's mine:

hexbear.net

HornyOnMain@hexbear.net to chapotraphouse@hexbear.netEnglish · 2 years ago
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See, I’m no tankie, I’m a radical anarcho communist according to this chart

Link if you want to try it yourself: https://www.politicalcompass.org/test

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  • MoreAmphibians [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    It’s natural for children to keep some secrets from their parents.

    How is this a political question?

    When you are troubled, it’s better not to think about it, but to keep busy with more cheerful things.

    Do the makers of this test know what politics is?

    Astrology accurately explains many things.

    The only relevant ideology that believes this is Reaganism.

    • HornyOnMain@hexbear.netOP
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      Time for “is school authoritarian?” struggle session 2.0 what-time-is-it

      • PM_ME_YOUR_FOUCAULTS [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.netBanned
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        We have to agree on whether bedtimes are authoritarian first

        • ScrewdriverFactoryFactoryProvider [they/them]@hexbear.net
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          “I need to know when my child is supposed to sleep. Please harness the unperturbed ground-state hyperfine transition frequency of the caesium 133 atom. Please issue a new leap second.” - Statements dreamed up by the utterly Deranged

      • Maoo [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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        Foucault says school is bad. That’s it. That’s what his book says right here: “school is bad honhonhon”.

        • ThomasMuentzner [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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          French people Bad ! its proven , so their opinions are as well …

          • autismdragon [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/French_petition_against_age_of_consent_laws

      • Harrison [He/Him]@ttrpg.networkBanned from community
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        The modern schooling system in the US and much of Europe has evolved directly out of educational institutions pioneered in the 19th century with the intent of turning the working class into better soldiers and subjecting them to nationalist indoctrination.

        The rigidly enforced structure and hierarchical relations inside of it are obviously authoritarian.

      • Dirt_Owl [comrade/them, they/them]@hexbear.net
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        deleted by creator

    • LaGG_3 [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      How is this a political question?

      It is a test designed by Libertarians libertarian-alert

    • jhulten@infosec.pub
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      Not seeing your children as people is some whack authoritarian shit

    • Dirt_Owl [comrade/them, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      deleted by creator

      • AssortedBiscuits [they/them]@hexbear.net
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        The test was designed by some libertarian, so I think I have a good guess of what the libertarian meant by “secrets” that children should keep from their parents.

    • AOCapitulator [they/them, she/her]@hexbear.net
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      That second one is “are you a vibes based liberal?”

      Pretty cutting question tbh

    • GarbageShoot [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      Do the makers of this test know what politics is?

      I think that one is a valid prompt because many people do take that attitude and there are some major cults built around it

  • tactical_trans_karen [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    You’re all a bunch of libs, if you won’t provide the vanguard, I will!!!

    stalin-shining

    Seriously though, I had to respond with some fucked up ideals to get it to register like this. This test is beyond trash and they want donations at the end lol! The ultimate lib grift.

    • HornyOnMain@hexbear.netOP
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      I tried to go as “authoritarian” as possible by its standards and I only got this

      • tactical_trans_karen [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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        Yeah, I had to say shit like gay=bad as though that’s some kind of measure. Pretty sure you have to type in the n-word and choose to kill all homeless people to get to the top of the chart.

  • HornyOnMain@hexbear.netOP
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    Picturing xinternet doing the test and finding out that he’s an anarchist

    • Duży Szef [he/him]@lemmygrad.ml
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      If you aren’t hitler or mussolini you literally can’t get to auth-left. This shitty test is essentially a “are you an asshole?” test and if you answer “no” you will be hailed as the one true anarchist. So yes. Xi would be considered an anarchist by the political cumpiss.

      • AcidSmiley [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        yeah this. the entire questionaire is built in a way that makes it impossible to be auth-left unless you’re some kind of nazbol or strasserite. none of the questionaire items deal with positions that would actually be “authoritarian” positions of a Marxist-Leninist, such as “freedom of the press and freedom of assembly sometimes have to take a backseat to fighting off counter-revolutionaries” or “a vanguard party sometimes needs to do purges to weed out corruption, incompetence and careerism”. Instead, you are an authoritarian leftist if you hate abstract art and gay people and beat your children. Like, that’s literally what you need to answer to score as a Maoist. If you espouse social policies of the USSR, such as being pro-abortion, being anti-racist and getting women out of the kitchen and into the universities, this test counts you as less of a Marxist-Leninist.

        It’s pure horseshoe theory at work, it tries to measure how fascist you are and how communist you are by the same questions, and the result is that actual communists cannot score as communists. Go figure.

        • HumanBehaviorByBjork [any, undecided]@hexbear.net
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          Yeah it really raises questions about those 16 year olds on /r/politicalcompassmemes who have the red flair

          • AcidSmiley [she/her]@hexbear.net
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            r/pcm users by flair:

            blue: nazis

            red: nazis who want free healthcare

            green: nazis who like to smoke weed

            purple / yellow: nazis with more than 1TB of CSAM on their harddrive

        • nightshade [they/them]@hexbear.net
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          The one good thing that the test does is highlight how thin the pretense that (American and American-inspired) conservatives have of wanting “personal freedom and small government” is.

          Even in countries where sexism, homophobia, and abusive parenting are (unfortunately) still common amongst the left, many people would still end up in the libertarian half just by supporting racial equality, international unity, and abortion. Like, I tried doing the test except with my answers changed to support homophobia, anti-drug/porn laws, and hitting children and still ended up (barely) in the libertarian half.

          And yet, despite the test being made by right-libertarians to promote their ideology, the vast majority of Americans who take it fall on the bottom-left to top-right spectrum, with only a handful in the bottom right quadrant.

          Edit: They also do election analysis where they put candidates on the chart (basically just based on vibes) and it still follows a bottom-left to top-right spectrum. Interestingly enough, they do label the vast majority of candidates in the 2020 US elections as right-wing authoritarians, despite the fact that their test labels anyone to the left of Mike Bloomberg as a left-libertarian.

          spoiler


          • AcidSmiley [she/her]@hexbear.net
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            Note how there’s several cnadidates so right-wing on economics that they are basically off the chart.

  • corgiwithalaptop [any, love/loves]@hexbear.netM
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    Someone help how do I score this?

    • Dirt_Owl [comrade/them, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      deleted by creator

      • Dessa [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        Waluigi Wiggler meta has long been discredited. Yoshi Teddy is the way forward now

    • ScrewdriverFactoryFactoryProvider [they/them]@hexbear.net
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      up-yours-woke-moralists

  • kleeon [he/him, he/him]@hexbear.net
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  • HornyOnMain@hexbear.netOP
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    Here’s how you’re actually supposed to use the political compass:

    • keepcarrot [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      Damn, I’m a real centrist

  • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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    Alignment charts have poisoned modern culture lol

    • HornyOnMain@hexbear.netOP
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      Omw to show everyone that hexbear isn’t a tankie instance by being pro mao but still getting right on the bottom left corner

  • redtea@lemmygrad.ml
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    Seeing all these answers I can’t help but think the test is rigged to send people towards something like Chomsky’s ‘libertarian socialism’. It’s more useful to confuse people than to have them realise that they would (critically) support e.g. the USSR if they were permitted to make their own mind up. “Oh you have decent politics then you’re in this box here and whatever you do, don’t look up!”

    • barrbaric [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      Not quite. The political compass was designed by right-libertarians to trick people to trick people into thinking it was an actual ideology.

    • mustardman [none/use name]@hexbear.netBanned
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      The test isn’t rigged, leftists just generally describe their end goal, which is lib left in most cases.

      • SerLava [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        It is definitely rigged, it’s absolutely stupid. Okay guess what the difference between an anarchist and a marxist-leninist is?

        That’s right, an ML is an anarchist who hates gay people.

        You heard that right. That is actually how flagrantly bad that test is.

        • sawne128 [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          Because of the political compass everybody knows that “authoritarianism” is when racism and homophobia, and commies are “authoritarian” so they must be racist and homophobic.

  • Awoo [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    Polcomp literally isn’t capable of placing MLs in the top left. I have never seen an ML get top left as their result.

    • cosecantphi [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      It’s so far off base that a Marxist-Leninist state could reasonably use it as a quick litmus test to determine who needs reeducation and who doesn’t. Scoring far from the green zone in any direction implies a hardcore reactionary who likes to do eugenics and drown puppies.

      I wish I could time travel back in time to have Stalin take this test just to bring the results back and rub it in liberal’s noses when he too is in the green zone.

      • GarbageShoot [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        We can go off of his statements and policy to get an approximation. The only Auth thing that comes to mind is the homophobia

  • Duży Szef [he/him]@lemmygrad.ml
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    I’m sorry

    This shitty site thinks I’m an anarchist, I can’t deal with this. I’m now legally required, as per my political compass certificate to renounce my :order-of-lenin: and defederate myself from Lemmygrad. I will apply to Hexbear and they will be the judges wether I fit there or on :reddit-logo:. PLEASE I CAN’T BE A :cracker: PLEASE

    • Tastysnack@hexbear.net
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      deleted by creator

      • Duży Szef [he/him]@lemmygrad.ml
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        :angery:

        • Tastysnack@hexbear.net
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          deleted by creator

    • BlueMagaChud [any]@hexbear.net
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      you have no choice but to abandon bed time

      • autismdragon [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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        looks at clock reading almost 4 am Guess I’m an anarchist

    • tactical_trans_karen [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      Looks like you won’t have a home anywhere, we don’t accept libs. Smh

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  • Dirt_Owl [comrade/them, they/them]@hexbear.net
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    deleted by creator

    • Fibby@lemm.ee
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      It called me a “Centrist Marxists” and I feel insulted

      • Duży Szef [he/him]@lemmygrad.ml
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        Lmao, lemm.ee centrist curse

      • CupcakeOfSpice [she/her, fae/faer]@hexbear.net
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        I also got Centrist Marxist because, while it is probably necessary, I don’t like the idea of violent revolution.

        • Fibby@lemm.ee
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          Failure to reform gains support for a revolution. Threat of a revolution makes reform possible. Realistically, they should go hand in hand.

          Its probably a good label for me, I just don’t like the word centrist lol.

      • 𝒍𝒆𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒏@lemmy.one
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        What is this test called, want to take it too 🫠

        Edit: Found link further down

    • uralsolo@hexbear.net
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      deleted by creator

    • boredtortoise@lemm.ee
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      I remember similar descriptions (revolutionary-science-international-eco-progressive) last time I did it. The end label was something different, maybe close results between anarcho-communists & democratic-socialists or utopian. Should go through it again some day.

      • Dirt_Owl [comrade/them, they/them]@hexbear.net
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        deleted by creator

        • autismdragon [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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          In my experience its VERY hard NOT to get eco-marxist on this test.

          • Saizaku@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            It seems pretty hard not to get an eco label if you at all care about the environment.

            Here are my results, according to their own scales I should much better fit anarcho-syndycalism/communism (which I am), but I got an eco-anarchist label lol.

    • aaaaaaadjsf [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      Also got orthodox Marxist with eco Marxist second. Less internationalist and ecological than your results though. Even though I fundamentally disagree with some orthodox Marxist points (such as communism will start in industrialised/developed nations) and some Marxist Leninist points (like Lenin’s definition of imperialism).

    • stilgar [he/him] @infosec.pub
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      Was it this one? https://leftvalues.github.io/

      • Dirt_Owl [comrade/them, they/them]@hexbear.net
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        deleted by creator

  • CthulhusIntern [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    It’s impossible to get authoritarian on that test unless you hold the most stereotypical American right wing opinions.

  • Alaskaball [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    HERES YOUR MARXISM-LENINISM, YOU DAMN LIBERALS

  • regul [any]@hexbear.net
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    Political Dump-ass

    • Ram_The_Manparts [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      Political cumpiss

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