I’ll walk out in front of traffic to own the woke moralists
inshallah
Wokeness is when people aren’t getting hit by cars
Jordan Peterson would really OWN all of us if he stepped in front of an F350 going 93 mph
Come on Jordan prove you aren’t woke and do it
The longer that a car doesn’t annihilate your torso, the woker you are.
getting run over by ford 150 to prove that i’m a real man and not woke
they’re not pedestrians, they’re temporarily embarrassed monster truck drivers.
Listen I’m as anti car as they come, but you offer me a monster truck and I will switch sides for as long as I have it
He sure talks like a supervillain a lot.
With his benzo habit, I’m looking forward to him becoming an anti woke SoundCloud rapper with a supervillain Schtick. He can team up with the cosplayer who designed captain ancap.
JP becoming right wing MF Doom is both so stupid it couldn’t ever happen and so stupid it’s the only thing that could happen next.
It would be so fucking funny, he could be a villain with a power to clean rooms (as a metaphor for society, his tragic failing being unable to become clean himself.
Who thought the name Captain Ancap was any good in the first place? Say that out out. It’s a syllabic palindrome and just feels bad to say and sounds worse. Which is appropriate but like Ancapman. NAPtain Ancap would be at least sorta clever and give him a characteristic.
I thought palindromes were good because it allows the reader to assume it was planned
I’m also gonna use this as a chance to post my favorite real palindromes:
“Go deliver a dare vile dog”
“Borrow or rob”
“Egad alas a salad age”
“Oozy rat in a sanitary zoo”
Doc, note: I dissent. A fast never prevents a fatness. I diet on cod!
Nice!
Rats live on no evil star.
Go hang a salami, I’m a lasagna hog.
Do geese see god?
The first two are good, the second two are nonsense
Ok the 4th is an actual sentence, but such a specific context
I removed punctuation. I use ‘egad, alas, a salad age’ pretty often at work when we get a flood of salad orders. You can use number 4 as an insult and get it going as a normal ohrase
The salad age is certainly a vibe
Syllabic palindromes are usually the opposite. They’re generally tongue twisters to a point and always sound awkward.
The intentionality though, it displays creative use of language
It’s pretty much always by accident if it’s that awkward out loud. Especially in this case as a Superhero name. If you’re making up a Superhero shouting “never fear (name) is here!” is a good test. If it sounds bad maybe change it
Superheroes are from a written format though
“Captain Ancap and Doctor Benzo” would be a good capeshit franchise.
and 
What is the woke death? The fascist progrom?
Famous antifascist sniper, the Woke Death
Hideo Kojima? hOw? i tHoUgHt yOu wErEn’t PoLiTiCaL? nOw yOu pArTiCiPaTe iN dA cUlTuRe wAr?
“the woke death” is the name for my heavy metal cover of “Miss Pavlichenko”
The female chaos dragon.
When you wake up dead.
He just wants truck-kun to send him back to the isekai he thought he was in during the coma
He is lucid dreaming about that cum milking contraption
Soon.
Car parked on the side of the road will be getting a Netflix stand up special soon
He’s more benzo than man now.
“Woke death” sound so much more elegant using the French term: “la petit mort”
Why do so many people like this guy, again?
He gives people really simple, fortune cookie level advice, but he sandwiches it in a bunch of fancy big “academic” words and parables. So his audience likes him because he gives them simple solutions to complex problems and makes them feel smart for thinking that cleaning their room will magically fix all of their issues. He gives people faux confidence, which is why is audience is so rabid and loyal, like any good con artist, he has his audience addicted.
I’ve met a casual fan of his IRL and he was a Joe Rogan talker. As in he spoke like he was Joe Rogan doing his podcast IRL, a loooooot of bro dudes do this.
Yeah, that whole CHUD Joe Rogan/Ben Shapiro/Peterson group all feed into each other and turn their audience’s brain into weird dudebro mush.
Or maybe their brains were already mush and the dudebros just think that if they imitate their heroes enough their “intelligence” and popularity will rub off onto them.
It’s a slightly younger than me dude bro type. And I’m talking like 2-3 years, I noticed back in high school that my dudebros were more classico 80s jock style and even a year or two under they had a different flair. They were all big fans of Sublime and Red Hot Chili Peppers and most went through a river phase and I’m pretty sure that’s the problem right there.
Elaboration edit: they all suddenly became ‘open minded’ and ‘interested in what you have to say’ and seemed to take it as an invitation to interview people as a form of normal conversation where they’re not conversing but giving the Joe Rogan replies of ‘oh yeh’ and ‘that’s really interesting’ while clearly absorbing nothing and contributing less. They pretend to be curious but think just being a blank slate who adds nothing means they’re learning. It’s airheadedness posing as some sort of open minded enlightenment cause they went to a festival and did mushrooms once.
They have very messy rooms.
He told me I was a very strong lobster.
There’s a theory that fascists have severely stunted paychosexual development, so they need a strong daddy figure to tell them what to do. Jordan Peterson fulfils the role of surrogate father for some internet losers.
Capitalism is so innovative that it managed to create the world’s only fascist mode of transportation - the car.
folks, is it woke to live
Given how the dude put himself into a coma, that technically checks, I guess.
It’s woke to be awake
“Damn people being so Woke! It’s not fair! They’re far too alert for me to run them over”JP has been an oil shill for years now. It’s no surprise he’s also big into the pro-car conspiracy theories
Bro is definitely still on the good stuff.
