They call it the good book folks, well this here… This is the best book. The very best! Nobody else has books as good as this and trust me I know books folks, I wrote one too you know.
It’s called The Art of the Deal, and you know MAYBE if Jesus read it he coulda got a better deal with those romans you know. You’ll never see Trump up on that cross NOOOOO!
Still though Jesus… Very good guy, you should buy his book, this is the very finest most ACCURATE version too folks.
Folks, the bourgeois, they’re no good, more and more people are saying it. All these workers— the biggest, we have the biggest workers— very handsome workers come up to me and say, Comrade Trump there is a specter haunting Europe, and you know what, they’re right. These bourgeois are very nasty people, very very rude, and very unfair to the workers. They are stealing our surplus value and no one is doing anything about it. The proletariat comes up to me every day and says, Comrade Trump will you lead the revolution? And I gotta turn to them and say look, the instruments of capitalism will be used to bring about its destruction, believe me. The means of production, Obama never wanted to seize them. Well guess what? I’m seizing them. Landlords? They’re done for folks. Everyone told me— they said, Comrade Trump you won’t be the vanguard of the revolution and they would laugh, the media laughed the democrats laughed, guess who’s laughing now?
And then you have these capitalists, those are real beauties! This is their new hoax- they take a piece of machine, a big beautiful shiny new means of production, and they buy it and y’know, they own it, it’s a big beautiful shiny new machine, all the bells and whistles, bing bing bing, and then they have the workers- who are totally not being treated fairly in this country, folks, BELIEVE ME, totally exploited, and they have these workers-and they pay them a certain amount, could beee… $20 per hour, could be TEN, could be FIVE, could be TWELVE, they pay them a certain amount, okay, and with their labor they build the product.
See, I’d pay $60 for a Trump Bible if the passages were written in the style of a Trump speech.
I probably wouldn’t pay for it, but holy shit I would pirate the hell out of that ebook.
Curious if this passage is still in that bible:
“I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”
