• Lojcs@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      I also would like to learn this. Since you people federated I’ve seen more posts complaining about how aggressive users of this instance are than I did from users of the instance. Yall do seem to think about politics (edit: and hate liberals) a lot more than the average user but I’m yet to see the ‘vitriol’

      Edit: this is a genuine question. What bad experience is everyone talking about when they say hexbear is toxic?

      • silent_water [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        1 year ago

        we’re very active and have an anti-lurker culture + no downvotes, so if we see a bad take, we reply instead of downvoting and moving on. this leads a lot of people to get very animated and angry about us.

        • schroed4 [he/Him] @lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          Most people can’t just move on when they see something that distrubs them, and I think it would be unhealthy for most to change.

          • silent_water [she/her]@hexbear.net
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            1 year ago

            agreed! criticism and folding received criticism (even when it’s offered abrasively) back into your own behavior is essential. this was one of the motivators in disabling downvotes.

            • schroed4 [he/Him] @lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              I expect it likely works quite well in a community where everyone knows and agrees to that. In my opinion, when the pond gets too big it becomes too hard to tell if what the abrasive-but-fair from the just-being-a-jerk comments

              Like, I was distracted for hours and couldn’t sleep then couldn’t work because of a side-comment insult im a post because it went against someone I strongly believe in. Had to research everything that was being said in the post and carefully reply to move on. That is not the life I want for myself. Don’t know how much of that really apply here, since like someone else said, I haven’t actually seen ‘mean’ hexbear comments outside of hexbear, and never gotten one.

              • silent_water [she/her]@hexbear.net
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                1 year ago

                In my opinion, when the pond gets too big it becomes too hard to tell if what the abrasive-but-fair from the just-being-a-jerk comments

                firm moderation goes a very long way. if someone is just being a jerk, it’s time to remove the comment. if they’re doing it repeatedly, they need to be banned. doesn’t solve everything but we’ve built a very solid community following this approach over the past 3 years. we’re very tight-knit as a result.

                That is not the life I want for myself.

                no worries, it’s not for everyone.

      • WhatWouldKarlDo@lemmygrad.ml
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        1 year ago

        I think it’s in the same vein as all the handwave-y claims as the bigotry and hate that’s present on hexbear and lemmygrad. Nobody ever links a post, it’s just an oft repeated fable that somehow becomes “truth”. (Yes, I realise the irony in not linking to a post here, but I’m lazy and I’m sure you’ve seen them)

      • HornyOnMain@hexbear.net
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        1 year ago

        Early on hexbear really came out swinging and users were basically dunking on people left right and centre in lemmy.ml worldnews so that liberals would post something dumb, be prodded slightly by one or two users, then say something incredibly bad and have several hexbears dunk on them, then because of how active sort works their comments would be pushed higher up in the thread as would the thread into people’s feeds and then they’d get absolutely swarmed at that point.

      • usa_suxxx [they/them]@hexbear.net
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        1 year ago

        If I had to be nice, I would say that a lot of new Lemmy users have reddit brain and approach using Lemmy like reddit. A constant game of treating your fellow posters as opponents and trying to embarrass them. HexBear early on also had to work on eliminating this mentality

      • EmmaGoldman [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.netM
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        1 year ago

        Just as a clarification, our hatred of liberals is not the same as that of right-wingers. We hate capitalist ideology, not “wokeness” or something nonsensical like that. We are the exact people conservatives are trying to shit on when they say that.