I had a similar problem with my ex gf, but I’m a student that can’t work rn. She always wanted me to understand her problems and be there for her, but the opposite was non-existent. I could not complain, talk about my problems or even our problems because the conversation became a competition of who was worse, then she started talking about how men should be treating women and how I should put more emphasis in giving her all kind of details and pay for everything when she did nothing. I told her that generating money was the lower point on my list because I was struggling with my grades and needed to recover after a semester I took for my mental health.

Everything went downhill, all our conversations where about me not doing enough, the historical debt and how I should be doing things men do, even after I told her I was non-binary. That relationship affected my mental health A LOT, and it ended when she became an early stage physically abusive relation.

It took me some months to finally adopt the term, but I now carry it with pride and I always repeat that even if I use all pronouns, only being called he/him is something that needs to change.