Proposal: I think we (Hexbear and Lemmygrad) should make/organize a third space or collective of spaces for ““non-political,”” intentionally non-stressful topics and activities.

Long likely autistic- and I say this not as a bad thing but rather I'm a certain way, and then also currently my brain is a certain way though it's not bad- uh but anyways it's a spiel- explanation of reasoning

I’m rather new to Hexbear, but on the 'grad (and on Hexbear as well) as well as other chats- I think we all have noticed, and probably felt as well, a great deal of alienation in the broader society, as well as the stressors of the 'grad/Hexbear being among the few truly and primarily decent spaces online that get things, as well.

And we’ve all also experienced how it is like dealing with ghoulishness prevalent elsewhere, and probably also seeing others banned or being banned ourselves from reddit as well as other spaces, having our communities dismantled. I imagine between this and the alienation- it has taken a toll on many of our lives.

The Hexbear/Lemmygrad formats also have their limitations; while I’d not call them an org, the truth is that almost everyone needs a breather from as well as life and social inclusion outside of such spaces that focus on political issues, effortposting, and struggle sessions. My point here being that it sucks, when two of the only “truly decent” spaces online which get it are also often spaces that can take quite a bit of energy and mental availability to fully participate in. And it sucks even more that, for many of us, being largely alienated from other spaces outside of these inherently deeply political (not that anything is “not political”) spaces, we might have withdrawn from liberal-infested spaces (online and IRL) that previously held other activities with little stress nor effort involved- from gaming, fandoms, music, and all sorts of other spaces.

Frankly it sucks that, in the current political climate, being driven into the Fediverse and elsewhere, we’ve lost these mostly peaceful, chill spaces. And it sucks that even in the Fediverse (as well as elsewhere), due to our political understanding and discussion, our communities are actively- well, persecuted is the honest word.

I think that it’s about time that we (Hexbear and Lemmygrad) made a third, mostly disconnected space (and probably with the intent of not having direct connections beyond vetting/etc with the processes of Hexbear and the 'grad) for non-political socializing. We should have this disconnected space with whatever distance is deemed best (open for discussion, I’m not really a opsec person and have decent caution, that’s about that generally) from Hexbear and Lemmygrad, but from there we should be able to branch out with wholly ““non-political”” social activites and chilling perhaps even in other spaces.

Also if anyone can word this better than me (I’m generally already likely/almost definitely deeply autistic- and I don’t say that as a bad thing, but it also is a certain way as I imagine this reads- but my mind is somewhere weird but not bad right now) I say please go for it. Hell, make another post about this. TBH I also don’t really want to be at the center of such developments though I’m open to being a part of making it and amongst those starting it- but basically knowing myself while I tend to have these kinds of ideas and also when I’m in a good space in life tend to get people together, etc- so far I’ve never had such energy sustainably (working on it) and I’m just a hot wreck/dumpster fire in so many ways, and NOT someone who knows much about the any of the things necessary for this (if people wanted to figure out a VC or discord or Steam group or whatnot I could probably handle though).

Needless to say, I think we could all benefit greatly from this. Personally regardless I’m likely going to at least try to assemble friends/people I know are chill both from IRL and here for my own interests, if we don’t create something akin to this ourselves (but I think that both the Hexbear and Lemmygrad communities show a blatant and extreme need for this amongst many of us- myself included).

Ideas that come to mind for instance that could be incredibly cool- voice chats with karaoke, trans voice training, gaming, etc. VRchat or expanding into MMOs or other game communities (having our own guilds or some shit, not that I play any MMOs rn). Promoting, collaborating with, enjoying, etc. our own chill creative works and sites/etc on other platforms (while not having it connected to our politicking on Hexbear or the Grad)- Twitch, X/formerly Twitter (always get a kick out of saying that admittedly) Youtube, Instagram, Pinterest, TikTok, etc. or perhaps better alternatives (probably what I’m suggesting is also terrible opsec and I’m sure that crowd will rightfully dunk on this take).

We already have something similar in the TV/Movies watching channels in Hexbear, and I know there’s Hexcraft or whatever the server name is. Why not expand out further yet still (and also provide a non-chud space for people to take a breather and just live)?

Also- since many comrades on both instances and elsewhere are struggling for the reasons listed, especially in these times… this could help us all just hype each other up (“apolitically”) and help us all be the best comrades we can be. Self-care through group care and all that is hella praxis.

Additionally, if it needs further explaining- my comments elsewhere which led to this train of thought (only my comments, so no worries) from other chats from Hexbear and a friend from the 'grad

actually. hm. while I’d hesitate to take a leading role in it as I’m a hot mess as an understatement and rarely sustainable (want to work on being better) I should see about pushing for some hexbear/grad chill non-pol (mostly non-pol) space. was talking in tracha about it tbh non-pol as in “”““non-political””" as bullshit as that concept is, but basically because struggle sessions and/or getting infiltrated or etc sucks

while I never sustain them (because I’m a dumpster fire lol… working on stopping that cycle) I do get people together sometimes when in an upswing (energetic) phase think it’s def needed esp in these times

tbh got to talking w another friend and gonna see about proposing and pushing for a third (hangout/“”“non-pol”“” or low-pol/also less stress) space, perhaps between Hex and the Grad and whoever is not a lib ghoul from elsewhere since sometimes some of the rest of the fediverse and the internet, I suppose, are good people (though they aren’t sending their best) lol gonna write up a proposal or some sort tho don’t think I want to be central to it as while I can be good at sorting these things out sometimes I’m also a dumpster fire and unsustainable historically but we should make some sorta space. in the fediverse, maybe even outside it o hm that wasn’t the whatchamacallit uh crossout thingy like as in, idk. could have voice training, vrchat if anyone does, gaming, karaoke, IK there’s already the tv watching etc spaces… tbh also if it were separate enough ish could even hypothetically be “less” (still probs best to be at least considerably) worried about opsec or could even utilize easier/etc platforms with vetting from the grad/hex like for instance steam groups, twitch, discord, hell if I know what else. mmos etc. because by having the political stuff elsewhere (still connected and whatnot and absolutely necessary, but I think so are some such- idk more chill spaces for comrades to chill) it becomes just a whole lot less- risky as well granted I ain’t one of those who is all 👌about that opsec, I have decent caution and that’s about it. but could be discussed since def some people (myself) would want to use such platforms probs also

like for instance, saw a reddit (acquaintance? well someone I messaged a bit once, trans commie who sadly I never recced to come to the grad or hex, but who had moved from the US to China) was banned recently. no way to contact we oughta get some non-pol spaces which are tied adjacently to the old pol spaces

if that makes sense. no more getting swept under the rug, until other platforms are fully adopted and have all the means we can use what exists (separately and alongside hex and grad)

Anyways, please consider. Also obligatory Aftonsparv because I still want them as an emote

  • ReadFanon [any, any]@hexbear.net
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    2 days ago

    I get the sense that we have been thinking along the same lines here.

    I actually just launched a moderated third space/hangout space with this project of mine recently. (Also feel free to hang out in the neurodiverse comm - self-diagnosis/self-diagnosis[maybe?] is valid and recognised there.)

    My intent for the project is to allow comrades to blow off steam and to get peer support from myself if they choose to, as I have worked in peer work roles before. Just trying to make up the gap in mental health services and accessibility while providing a service to the community here in some small way.

    The downside of this is that it’s a space that is quite strictly moderated due to the nature of it, so it requires a bit more of a hands-on approach for it to work, however I could totally see people using that game as a platform to make an unstructured third space for comrades just to hang out in online and maybe engage in the self-care/group-care informally without a particular person facilitating the whole thing, especially if my project is a success. I figure if I’m not around to run a formal peer support server but people want to hang out then they’re just gonna host their own server regardless.

    Anyway, you’re very welcome to join the peer support server (once it’s fired up and running later today, or later on when I’m running future sessions) to scope it out and see what it’s all about or to use it for peer support. It’s only in it’s soft-launch phase right now meaning it’s early days so set your expectations accordingly. I’m also happy to provide guidance with setting up the “infrastructure” for this kind of thing (the social end of it, not the hardware and coding side) if anyone else wants to make something happen.

    As it stands my current project is a one-person show but it doesn’t really need more people behind it yet. If demand goes wild for it, I’d be happy to provide guidance to someone else on how to run a peer support space themselves. It’s been an awfully long time since I’ve trained peer workers but I’m sure I’d be able to dust off that skill set if there was someone who was interested in this stuff. I’m not in it for glory or to stake out my turf - I’d be glad to help someone set up their own parallel space based on their own vision or to have them work under the auspices of my project, provided I have the capacity to do so.

    • SadArtemis [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
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      2 days ago

      Sounds awesome, and I’ll definitely check it out! Sounds like it’ll be up soon (an hour from now)? Considering I’m a disaster I just woke up from a nap, so it’s perfectly timed for me lol…

      And I’ll definitely check out the neurodivergence comm- I do see posts from it sometimes FWIW. I’m self diagnosed(?)

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      With the caveat that I may have been diagnosed in the past in a different country with I think it was OCD or BPD, but I’m not really sure and considering the extenuating circumstances I don’t really identify with it, rather there are some other things I am intending to look into and get diagnosis for and have childhood assessment documents pertaining to before my parents noped out for many reasons incl. stigma and family history).

      And I’d be glad to chat or learn in regards to both peer support, or running such a space

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      (I certainly wouldn’t consider what I’d start a proper “support” space though knowing myself and my vibes sometimes it absolutely will be effectively one, but a rather just a hangout, but IMO the world is large enough for infinite spaces, things never have to be exclusive, and “we’ll always have Hexbear/the Grad…” must admit that I am interested in both helping others make their own, creating collective spaces, and then “staking out” a turf or space that’s just right for myself and people who really vibe in the same fashion- not for poweruser/power games purposes but just to have such a space if that makes sense).

      See you in webfishing soon! (Recently, as in a week or more ago got, not played overly much yet but it seems neat).

      • ReadFanon [any, any]@hexbear.net
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        2 days ago

        Yep, we’re going live in about one hour and ten minutes from now. There’s a link to a countdown timer in the announcement post.

        I’m going to take a quick nap and sort out a few things so I’m all prepared for running the drop in space. Either I’ll catch you in there and we can chat about what you’ve mentioned in your reply or I’ll circle back around to it after the session is over and I’ve had a chance to catch my breath.